Tuesday, 1 March 2011

Mother's Day trauma

Well hello March.  At last I am starting to feel warmer, spring is definitely in the air and the sun is shining here in Scotland.

I love the month of March.  Jack was born in March, on Mother's Day in fact. Since he was born, Mother's Day didn't fall on his birthday again until two years ago.

Since my mum died, I dread Mother's Day.  When I get a calendar at Christmas time, that's the first date I look up so that I know what date it is going to be and I get any march birthday cards early so that I can avoid the stands containing those dreaded cards.

This year when I looked at the calendar, no mother's day date, anywhere, at all!  Then I came to the conclusion that it must be because I have an Anne Geddes calendar and since she is Australian, maybe the dates are different there.

So I searched my diary and still no date!  Confused or what?  Now I am peed off cos how can I avoid the dreaded date, when I don't even know when it is!

I mentioned this to my friend Kathy who then informs me that "guess what? Mother's Day is in April this year!!".  I am totally gobsmacked! WTF????  How can this be, it's always been in bloody March!

I have to admit, since my mum died, I have noticed that the date for mother's day has been a bit erratic.  It always used to be the third Sunday in March but over the last 5 years it has been at the beginning of the month, half way and even near the end.  I mean, what is going on?

So this is my question people.  Who decides?  Is there a wee guy/lady in a wee office somewhere with a giant calendar trying to mess with my groove?  Is it just pot luck, as in they blindfold themselves and just wave their finger around, just point to the damn calendar and where their finger lands is where mother's day is? Or is it to do with the planets? Or is is science?  Tell me cos I need to know!  Is it connected to Easter cos again that used to be in the middle of  April and now it is at the end of March.  Seriously, whoever has the job, I just want you to know that you are seriously f**king with my chi!!!!


Anyway, I digress.  I was going to tell you about two years ago when Jack's birthday landed on Mother's Day for the first time since he was born.  My mum's birthday was the day before, 21st and Jack's birthday/mother's day was the day after.

The day of my mum's birthday, Saturday, was spent running around buying supplies for his birthday party and collecting the cake.  I had ordered an ice cream cake cos he was really struggling to eat at that point but when I went to collect it, they had ordered the wrong size!  The cake was lucky if it would feed 6 people as opposed to the 10+ people who were coming to his party.  Eeeek! Panic set in but then Kathy, who is a chef, calmed me down and said that we could give the ice cream cake to the kids and she would make a Baked Alaska for the adults. Phew!  Thank god for friends!

the very small birthday cake!!!

We had been so busy, had been in and outta shops/supermarkets all day and we were just driving home when  I realized that I had forgotten to buy flowers for my mum's grave.  Kathy was all for going back to to the flower shop or the supermarket but I had truly had enough of shopping by this time so as I was driving out of Forres (a town 12 miles from Elgin), I spotted some wild daffodils growing by the side of the road.

Quickly I pulled in and Kathy looked at me as if I had gone mad.  I explained that we were going to pick these daffodils, cos they were my mum's favourite flower and lets just hope we don't get caught!  As we set to work, a bus full of passengers pulled up on the opposite side of the road and people were giving us a good eyeballing but I was so intent that I didn't even notice them.  Soon we both had quite a good bunch of daffodils each, so we dived back into the car and sped off.  As we were driving along, Kathy commented that "she was sure it was against the law to pick wild flowers by the road side" and I laughing said "I'm not sure, I know it is!!!!" as I cracked up laughing.

We both giggled all the way to the cemetery in Elgin, like a pair of naughty school girls.  Kathy, who had the daffodils on her lap, soon had a lovely wet patch there and we figured it was a wee bit of Karma for stealing them.  We both agreed that my mum would have found this highly amusing and probably would have done the same thing herself if she had been in my position. All this laughter meant I was able to cope with being at her grave on her birthday.  Three years had gone by, at that point, since she had died and I still found it really really hard.  Instead of being sad that day, I was giddy from the laughing at the thought of her reaction to her 'stolen' daffodils.  It turned out to be a really good day.

Myself and Kathy, partners in crime

The next day, Jack's birthday/mother's day we were up early preparing for Jack's party.  Kathy took this opportunity to inform me that she had never made a Baked Alaska. Eeeekkkkkkkkk! So we looked up the recipe on the internet and she had a go anyway.

it turned out pretty good eh

The day went really well, his cake was yummy and the Baked Alaska even better.
Jack was pretty flat for the first half of the day but he rewarded me with the biggest smile and it just melted my heart.

getting ready to smile at me....

A big cheesy birthday grin!

The two days I had dreaded were not so bad after all.


  1. Awww... That's such a sweet, touching incident. I guess it's these happy-sad moments in life that are closest to our hearts. :)

  2. Mother's day is the 4th sunday of Lent and Easter ios dictated by the lunar cycle.]Actually, it's the sunday when all the servants in the big hooses were allowed to go back to their Mother Church - where they lived!!!
    I know - fund ofm useless info!!

  3. Aw what a great story! I would have totally been picking flowers with you! Illegal or not!

  4. That was a great story Lynne and some really good pictures. Actually Mother's Day this year is on May 8th which would have been my father's birthday. He died in 1974. Have a great rest of the week.

  5. Lovely photos, especially Jack with his cheesy grin! But a bittersweet story and, yes, Mother's Day is always tied in with the date of Easter, both of which are much later than normal this year.

  6. In the US Mother's day is always the 2nd Sunday of May and Father's day is the 3rd Sunday of June. Boy is it was floating like easter I would never be able to keep up (I have a hard time as it is)
    I know what you go through as well. I lost my Mother the Wed. after Mother's Day in 2001. So I had a really hard time with it for years. I still miss her, but it does get a little easier.
    I loved the story of the flowers and I am sure your mother was laughing right along with you.

    Pamela Jo

  7. That is such a great story. My older sister was also born on mother's day except her's the US Mother's Day. Her birthday has only landed on Mother's Day three times, May 10th. I am so glad the day worked out so well :D

  8. Pencil Girl - oh definitely
    Julie - oh get you, full of useless info for sure :)
    JM - another partner in crime, I like it!
    Odie - I think we always miss our parents
    Thisisme - well I have definitely learned something new cos I never knew they were connected :)
    Pamela Jo - it's good to know it gets a little easier :)
    Jax - having a birthday on these dates is a right pain at times isn't it? but lovely at the same time :)

  9. Aww that is cute.

    Yeah the 2 anniversary of Cammy's mom's death is on te 13th and I'm sad that I won't be there to be with him because I'll be out of town. :(

    The Adorkable Ditz' Missteps

  10. When I was a kid around the time of WWII it was traditional for everyone to wear a flower pinned on their coat lapel or their dress when we went to church on Mothers Day. It seems that we wore carnations or something like that. If your mother was still living I believe the flower was red, and if she was deceased it was white.

  11. Ditz - thanks. I am sure Camm knows you will be thinking of him
    Don - that was an interesting story :)

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  13. Teresa - thanks for the info :)

  14. I never knew Mother's Day was on different days in different places! You have taught me something new! I also love the daffodil story. Good for you for making the best of the situation! I can't imagine losing my mother. I dread the day. I don't think I will ever stop missing her once she's gone.

  15. Emily - you don't ever stop missing them, it's awful but it gets better with time :)


Laughter is the best medicine and it's free. Thanks for visiting my blog and I look forward to hearing from you.

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