I'm used to Jack scaring me on a regular basis what with the constant seizures and now with the problems with his chest. After a while, what is so scary, becomes the norm so you get used to it.
Holly scaring me is something I don't think I will ever get used to! Holly you ask? but she doesn't have any health issues!
No she doesn't but she does have an ipod and headphones and believe me she is lethal with them.
I know, I know, you now think I have lost the plot don't ya but I most definitely have not.
These days, it's tiny mp3 players with tiny headphones so it's hard to tell, when someone has their back to you, whether or not they are plugged in or just plain ignoring you.
Holly often shuts herself in the kitchen, playing her music and dancing around. Usually I can hear the music cos she plays it so loud that I can't hear myself think. Other times, she just disappears into the kitchen and there is total silence which usually means she is plugged into her ipod.
This is when I literally take my life in my hands cos often I have to get into the kitchen to get stuff for Jack or make myself a cup of tea.
So I open the door and Holly is in her own wee world, dancing round the kitchen. I make big movements so that she can see me cos she definitely can't HEAR me. Movements such as jumping up and down, waving my hands to attract her attention accompanied by loud yelling cos you just never know she might just hear me after all. ( I hasten to add that jumping up and down is already a high risk factor for someone with big boobs, concussion springs to mind).
This goes on for a couple of seconds or even as long as a minute, then she will catch sight of me out of the corner of her eye and she looks at me, and I think it's ok, she's seen me but then she lets out a shriek that would not be out of place in a horror movie and I nearly jump outta my skin!
She is clutching her heart and near to tears cos I have scared her and I'm like wtf??? as my heart is trying to jump outta my chest and I have just lost another of my 9 lives!!! There then follows a conversation in "high tones" where she is upset and I am angry cos she has scared the bejesus outta me but it's my own fault don't you know cos she was plugged in and didn't see or hear me!
By the time we have both calmed down, I have forgotten why I went into the kitchen in the first place and she's taken on the persona of one of the seven dwarfs, usually Grumpy with a bit of Dopey thrown in!!!
I have tried just opening the door and just waiting for her to see me with no wild movements but no she still screams! Even with the door left open, if I were to just walk past the door and she catches sight of me, she screams! It's getting to the point that I am having to think twice about venturing anywhere near her cos even my mere presence whilst she is plugged in can invoke a blood curling scream as she seems to go off onto a different planet whilst listening to her ipod.
I have had a good long look in the mirror and believe me, I know I can look a bit scary first thing in the morning but after an hour or so I start to look semi decent. Honest!!!
There are times, I haven't even gone into the kitchen, just yelled for her help cos maybe Jack is having a bad seizure and as I am in the middle of changing him, I can't reach the magnet. Usually on these occasions she is not plugged in but playing her music really loud. By the time she hears me, I am hoarse and she is upset cos I gave her a fright cos I yelled so loud!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I cannot win!
Usually we end up laughing cos hey it is quite funny really.......yeah if it was happening to someone else!
Like this morning for instance, there was no ipod to blame just her opening the living room door just as I got to it but she was still trying to watch the TV so she was turned away. Trying not to scare her I just spoke, saying something totally random like "where are you going?" and she let out this blood curdling scream and I nearly shit myself, I jest you not!
Her first words to me after she calmed down was "what kinda question was that? where did you think I was going, to get my breakfast...duh!" Then we both exploded with laughter cos well what can I say to that. Not only am I scary but I am a bit of a numpty too! Cheers Holly. I'm really not getting a complex or anything!
I thought things might improve when she bought herself a set of huge headphones, the old fashioned kind. At least then I know to avoid her like the plague when she has them on. That's ok when you can see her but when she is in her bedroom with the door shut and you are yelling like a banshee til you're blue in the face, so are then forced to stomp up the stairs, throw open the door looking wild and snarling, yes you would expect her to scream.
Yet still I jump about 6ft and she is totally traumatised by this angry, snarling lady who is now clutching her heart, using expletives that I know I shouldn't repeat!!!!
So I have come to the conclusion that my kids are trying to kill me! Jack with his many weird and scary seizures and Holly with her really dangerous weapon, the IPOD!!!! lol :-)