In my next life I am coming back as a very pampered pooch.

Hello there my little gigglers.

I am so sorry for my lack of blog posts. It's not that I haven't had anything to say, it's more that there is so much to say that I didn't quite know where to start!

This is probably gonna be a long post, so get yourself a cuppa, pull up a chair and read on.

I feel like I have been running, constantly trying to catch up since Jack came out of hospital. It's really hard to take home a child who is still quite ill and not have an answer as to why he was. In the past, we knew what was wrong, dealt with it medically in hospital and was usually sent home, thinking "thank goodness I/we don't have to go through that again!".

This time, the problem still existed. I came home with more meds than you can shake a stick at....over twenty, with about 18 of them everyday meds, and loads more "as required" meds to help should Jack become sore again and be unable to lie still.

I have had to use these meds, one in particular, quite a lot but in desperation, I have also turned to my faithful friend Google and looked up alternatives to use at home. My favorite, which in the end, I didn't need Google for seems to be peppermint tea! This stuff is saving my sanity at the moment. All hail peppermint tea!

The peppermint leaf

Who'd have thought it would work to relax his bladder but hey, I figured that, if it works on your stomach then hopefully it will have a knock on effect. So far so good.

Then barely weeks after we got out of hospital, there was our trip to Disney, which was amazing but also exhausting. We were only home a day before Holly and I were heading off to see Robbie Williams in concert. We had a ball but the night ended in a way I never expected.

The concert was great. After standing for a good 6 hours, we then had to walk for about another hour and a half to get a taxi. In the 15 mins it took to get across town to my car. Holly's joints had seized up. She had trouble getting out of the taxi and had to lean on me to go the short distance to where my car was parked. I had to help her in and physically move her legs into position before snapping the seat belt in.

She was so distressed and it got worse when we had to do the same again but in reverse to get into the hotel. By the time I got her undressed and into bed, it was 1.30 am but I couldn't sleep. I had known she was having more trouble with her joints than before (she started having trouble about age 14) but this was a huge shock. I will admit, I felt totally overwhelmed.

So this summer we had numerous appointments with the GP, who drove me nuts with her lack of concern. Finally I managed to persuade her to investigate more when I blurted out that her brother was disabled which seemed to light something in her eyes and she agreed to discuss Holly's case at a team meeting two days
hence.

True to her word, she called to say they wanted more blood tests. We went up that same day and had to wait a week for results. Meanwhile, much to my annoyance, she insisted that Holly self refer to see a physiotherapist before they would even think about sending her for a scan.

The blood results came back with a note saying two things were slightly raised in her blood but it had been marked No Further Action. I thought I was going to explode! So we asked for another appointment with the same GP only to be told she had left!!!

As luck would have it, we were given an appointment the same day we were due to see the physio.

That morning, she could hardly get out of bed, let alone walk. It hurt so much to watch her struggling. The physio was lovely but said there was little she could do without a diagnosis (which I knew...grrr!!!) She advised us to really push for a rheumatology appointment and was very kind to us, which made us both cry.

Later in the afternoon, we saw the GP. When he called out her name, Holly had a real job getting out of the chair, as she had seized up, in the 5 mins she had been sitting. She literally shuffled up the corridor towards him. It seemed to take so long to get to his room that automatically I put my arm out to let her lean on me.

We were in his room less than 5 mins. We didn't have to push for the rhematology referral as he could see by looking at her that she had a major problem. He said she most likely had arthritis, should be walking with a stick and not leaning on her mum!!! He advised us of stuff to take til then and we were out of the door.

At least nowadays you can get funky ones! To buy click here

We got back into the car and I just drove. I didn't know where I was going but we ended up in the country in some secluded spot where she fell apart in my arms. I could feel myself unraveling then too. I didn't know what to say or do cos nothing was going to help so I just held her and cried.

Then we drove to my dad's house, told him the news and he just held her. My dad looked as dazed as I did! It really felt like a very dark day. As we were leaving, my dad hugged me tight and with tears in his eyes said "my god girl, you were born fighting and you've been fighting ever since, I just hope you have the strength for this one". That's when I really broke. How I got home is beyond me cos I couldn't see for tears.

During all this, there was family drama too and not of the good kind. My lodger was causing all sorts of trouble for me with family members and I learned a lot of hard lessons this summer.

So lessons learned you ask?

Well.....I have learned that if a family member asks you to do something major for them but your gut is screaming NO, then trust your gut cos it will come back and bite you on the ass.

I have learned that I can't change the way people think about me and that really I no longer care either way.

I have learned that if someone is going to be two faced, no matter how hard they try, neither of these faces are pretty.

I have learned that someone who pushes their way into your life and invades every part of it are usually there to cause trouble.

I have learned that if someone twists your words and people who know you well. believe it, then it is not up to me to change their way of thinking. It's true what they say, you never stop learning...just some lessons are easier to stomach than others.

Picture from here

We had visitors too. My oldest friend from school and her family came to stay and what a week of madness it was! Her husband Ged helped me cut down half of the garden. I don't know who got the most satisfaction, him or me but I am not sure he enjoyed the trips to the recycling as much! Neither did I cos I did serious damage to my big toe!

Susie was a huge help with Jack which was awesome as it was nearing the end of the school holidays and exhaustion was kicking in. We had such a laugh together and the house felt empty when they went away.

We've had two trips to Rachel House, one just to chill and the other was for moving Holly back to Uni. I just love it there and you meet some great people who just "get" you.

On top of that we managed to pack in another visit to Cray House which really is a little slice of heaven for me. This time we invited my friend Kathy and her two kids plus Holly's other friend Georgia. We were only there a few days but everyone had such a laugh. I knew it was going to be good when the banter started five minutes after Diz got in the car. She is so cheeky!

Holly and I also got away by ourselves for a few days and we went up to Kyle of Lochalsh. We had such a laugh but that is definitely a post for another day.

It has been an eventful summer and I can hardly believe we are at the end of September! Already there is a chill in the air and the colours of autumn are arriving.

I just love this time of year, don't you?